the perfect date

.
a circle completes all dots.

like all stories and connections,
that passes thru our lives,
they mean something,
when someone comes into your life,
there's a reason for it.

like blogging too,
it's meant to leave something behind,
a memoir, a story, a past.
it is after all an online journal.

when life comes, or any matter to that,
there are good times and bad times,
but all things comes to an end.

and i feel that, if given a choice,
i want my tombstone to end in a circle.

11.03.83 - 11.03.08

it looks damn GOOD!
next round would probably be,

11.03.83 - 11.03.10

so i give myself a countdown,
55 days to go,
and i decide,
what the tombstone shall be like.

i want to be good.
do good.
i want to patch things up.

i say a rosary a day,
hoping that you'll be blessed with love and joy.
i hope you'll be happy always.
i want to see you smile, laugh.
never again i wanna see you sad, with teary eyes.

i still seek for your forgiveness.

i'll make it up to you ben.
i promise.

cause i love you.

but this bipolar depression isn't doing much good.
i don't want to ruin things again.
then there's only one solution to solve it.